Saturday, November 9, 2013
You book-readers think you can walk around, looking down your nose at visual storytelling, thinking your shit don't stink.
Oooooh... that character was so much different! OOOH, it's not a book! Oooh, I think I'm going to go rub the leather patches on my tweed jacket and congratulate myself on how many books I've read!
I'm king of the damn universe, because I read!!! No one can understand my book-worshiping majesty. All other humans are knuckle-dragging walmart-trolls.
And you know what? I read this book. I READ IT MORE THAN ONCE. In the 90's, when books were books, and we read them, because TV shows didn't come out in DVD box sets. So, bite me.
I'm not going to compare the two. Because it's 2013, and I think we can move past this, yes? No.
NO, because every hipster douchebag at this screening walked out waxing poetic about how Bean was under-written, and blah blah blah.
I realize that waxing poetic about everything is sort of your thing, book-reading-hipster, but please, shut the fuck up.
This movie was fine. It was glossy. It was sci-fi. It was Harrison-Fordy. It had some bomb zero-gravity stuff. It was good-time-movie-fun. I realize that's not enough for you, book-reading-hipster. That is why I hate you.
Here's a haiku I wrote about you while walking home in the rain:
Oh, movie hipster
Why do you suck so, so much?
Skinny jeans and death
I saw this movie at Cinerama. (Which I was told is a Movie Nerd theater, but which is actually a Nerd Movie theater. There's a difference.) The Cinerama is an updated classic movie house with Cinerama (and super cinerama!) projection capabilities. I'd really like to see one of the classic movies they screen on film there. I think I'll go back soon. It has one gigantic screen, great seating, decent ticket prices, and excellent sound. Totally a great place to catch a show!
And, I did discover something in this movie that might be the greatest discovery I have made thus far in Seattle...
Wait for it...
CHOCOLATE (mother-fucking) POPCORN
Sweet Jesus. It was amazing. I think I gave myself diabetes, but it was totally worth it.
Posted by Peggy at 7:40 PM